The Second Time

I'm so glad you made time to see me.
-Taylor Swift, Back to December

Kau hadir di sini, dibatas kerinduanku.
-Vina Panduwinata, September Ceria


Itu adalah beberapa potongan bait lagu yang menggambarkan perasaan gw pada saat itu.
Disaat gw udah engga bisa nahan diri gw buat menghindar dari dia.
OK, gw tau gw udah coba berulang kali buat menghindar dari dia, tapi kenyataannya susah.

Okay, mungkin udah God's plan.
Seperti biasa, jumat siang.
Sehabis solat jumat, gw minta izin guru gw buat pinjem keyboardnya.

Disaat jari-jemari gw mulai memainkan lagu itu.
Gw berharap banget dia datang.
Duduk disebelah gw.
Gila-gilaan bareng. Mungkin duet bareng main lagu yang kita berdua tau.
Disitulah gw udah engga niat banget buat ngajarin temen-temen gw.
Gw tau temen-temen gw engga sabar minta diajarin lagu yang disuruh sama guru gw.
Tapi gw udah kebawa susana galau.
I stared at tuts keyboard, it reminded me the last day he taught me how to play the song.
The last day when we were playing keyboard together.

Mungkin engga ada sepuluh menit gw ngajarin temen gw.
Lagu yang gw ajarin pun bukan lagu yang disuruh sama guru gw.
Gw malah ngajarin lagu favorit gw --> River Flows In You.
Itu juga belum ke bagian Reff-nya.
Beda banget sama hari jumat sebelumnya.
Gw berhasil ngajarin temen gw lagu My Heart Will Go On.
Dari bagian Intro sampai mendekati Reff.

Hari itu beda banget sama hari-hari sebelumnya.
Engga ada semangat banget buat ngerjain sesuatu hal yang berguna.
Mungkin temen-temen gw ngerasain itu semua.
Akhirnya mereka semua mutusin buat pergi ke toko buku.
Gw nolak ajakan mereka. I just wanna stay there just for a while.
Okay, mereka pergi tanpa gw.

Ketika gw merasa puas karena sukses menyendiri beberapa saat, akhirnya gw mutusin buat pulang.
Entah kenapa ada seseorang yang berjalan dan menyebut nama gw.
Disaat gw sedang merapikan buku gw yang berserakan di atas meja, pas gw noleh ternyata orang itu dia. Dia yang udah gw tunggu selama seminggu ini, dan dia orang yang gw galau-in akhir-akhir ini.
Entah mengapa gw bersemangat lagi.
Tapi dalam hati gw bertanya "Is it real?"
Seorang yang gw tunggu-tunggu ada di depan gw.
Okay, gw masih engga percaya. -Sampai saat ini-

Karena kelas gw udah di booking buat eskul PMR akhirnya gw sama dia pindah tempat.
Setelah mencari-cari kelas yang kosong, finally we got it!
3rd floor. XI science 2.
Dan, okay gw engga jadi pulang.

And, you know what? I wanna faint.
Sampai sekarang gw masih engga nyangka aja hal itu bakal terjadi.
Well, the classroom was empty. Just we both.
Okay, sama seperti sebelum-sebelumnya. I was nervous.
Okay, akhirnya dia yang mulai dengan pertanyaan.
Setelah tau apa yang gw mau, mulailah dia memainkan tuts-tuts keyboard itu.
That was the second time i saw him played keyboard.
I sat beside him. I remembered his voice in the way he talked.
I remembered... His Grace in the way he played the keyboard.
I remembered... His Scent. Does he know that I love him?

Well, when I got what I wanted, He asked me to play classic song.
Okay, ada banyak lagu klasik yang gw tau. Für Elise, Canon, Moonlight Sonata, Greenleeves, Toreador, Beethoven's Fifth Symphony, Turkish March, dan masih banyak lagi lagu klasik yang gw tau tapi gw engga tau judulnya. Cuma ada tiga lagu yang udah gw kuasain teknik penjarian dan chord pianonya, Für Elise, Canon, dan Greenleeves.
Okay, dia minta lagu Canon, lagu yang touchable banget buat gw.
Endingnya, gw bertanya apa dia bisa main lagu Greenleeves.
Akhirnya dia minta gw buat main satu bait dari lagu tersebut.
OK, he can played the song.

Waktu pun terus berjalan, dan gw bingung bagaimana cara untuk mengakhiri pertemuan sore itu.
Well, ternyata dia sama seperti gw. Ketika udah stuck banget sama keyboard/piano kita akan melupakan hal disekitar kita. Sore itu dia menanyakan banyak lagu ke gw. Dan hanya beberapa lagu yang gw tau. Diantaranya adalah Imagine-nya John Lenon.
Gw pun masih engga percaya dia bisa play lagu itu.
Menurut gw itu something banget, ketika tau dia bisa play lagu itu.
Ketika gw dan dia udah kehabisan lagu buat di mainkan, akhirnya hujanlah yang memisahkan kita berdua. Hujan di sore itu, memisahkan gw disaat gw lagi bahagia.
Gw masih inget apa yang dia lakuin sebelum ninggalin kelas itu.
He wrote his signature on the whiteboard. Haha!

Pertemuan sore jum'at itu,meninggalkan kesan yang engga bisa dilupakan buat gw.
Yeah, I know he's busy with his romance.
Tapi menurut gw, seenggaknya dia udah meluangkan waktunya buat gw.
Yeah, walaupun engga setiap hari. Hehe..

Bagi gw, perhatian kecilnya itu adalah hmm you know what I meant ;).
Karena menurut gw, Cinta itu saling mengisi.
Cinta itu saling berbagi. Cinta itu saling mendukung satu sama lain.
Cinta itu kebersamaan. Cinta itu engga harus selalu dekat.
Dan Cinta itu senang melihat orang yang dicintai bahagia.

Haha, sorry ya jadi galau..
Okay, gw tetap pada pendirian gw.
I don't wanna tell him the truth.
Biarlah dia tau perasaan gw dengan sendirinya.

Broken Heart.

It has been nice story before.
Now. . .

Every now and then I fall apart.

I don't know how to hide this feeling.
Day by day this feeling won't go away.
Until the day almost come,
I'm here with a pain.
A pain in my heart.
No one can heal.

I thought my love story will be the best one than fairy tales.
But, I'm wrong.
Now, everything he did just wanna make me cry.
Now, he's so in love with the girl.
And I'm here with dumb stare just wondering.
I wonder if he knows that he's all I think about at night.

Since he found her, I thought he's changed.
He never talk to me whenever he's with her.
I remember the day he said "wanna be"
And at the same time I just smile. Exactly, a fake smile.
I remember the last night he chatted with me.
I remember the day he taught me how to play my favourite song on keyboard.
I remember how he treated me so good.
And I remember when the first time we met.


I wanna tell him the truth.
But, I'm too afraid to say. I'm too shy.
When he said he's in love, I felt like I was drowning.
Thought he loved me. Thought he cared about me. Thought he felt the same way.
But, I'm wrong.
He made me down. He tore my heart.
I just wanna stay away from him.
Because it's too late.


I said before, Now I don't wanna do the thing like before.
I don't wanna tell the boy I love.
I wanna let him know by himself.


This broken heart still survive.
While he got what he wanted.
I know she's beautiful. She's smart. And she's a kind person.
She better hold him tight, love him and treats him so good.
I think she's lucky.


But, I'm here wondering.
Why he made me smile. Why he made me laugh. Why he made me so ecstatic.
Why he made me feel that he loved me.
Can he tell that it just his way to treat his friend?
It's impossible to tell him what I feel. It's too late.
Now, he's trying to make her confidence.
I'm here just watch them. Watch their relationship.
Will they be a new couple in school?

Now, I'm standing here with a fake smile. I hide this pain.
And let them happy. Maybe their love story will be the best than fairy tales.
If they are in love, maybe there's no togetherness between us.
No Jokes. No Smile. No Laugh.
This broken heart will survive.