Hello, guys! What's up? It has been a while since the last post I published. I usually ended up a year with one post. Guess, I did not do that. I was planning to do so, but I felt like I better compile everything I want to share things that happened before the new year and the time after it.
As you see the title above, you might question what exactly it means. Well, it is not something bothering my ear, but likely the one that keeps making noise in my head. I actually feel that it is not the perfect time to tell you about that. I just need some time to process that everything that has happened was really in fact as I thought. You know, I guess I need more proof to convince me that it is really what it is.
By the way, I intended to name this post with alternative title. But, in the end, I decided to use this word to summarize all the context. (Well, every post I published "actually" sounded like that, right?). I planned to name this post with either "synchronicities" or "self-detachment". Why would I choose that? Let us get in to the point.
So, I was really a person who thinks (and believe) in that term "everything has its time." Back in time when I was just graduated from college, I was so frustrated because I had not gotten any job yet. My surrounding kept asking me all those questions like I did nothing to make changes. Well, I tried. But, I think that was not my time.
I was kind of building up a wall to defend my self with the sentence "everything has its time, wait for your time" (followed by efforts, of course). Finally, I got one. But, one thing that really bothers me here is, there are two point of views. One is about "time", and the other is about "detachment."
Maybe one of you know that I really want to take my master degree. That freaking want was really on fire after I graduated. Not to say that it stayed for a year. Every time I tried to apply to any job vacancy, my heart tried to negotiate with my mind. Maybe it was like this, "why didn't you try to apply for a scholarship?" Yes, it was like that I guess.
Some others would say that, "that kind of thought crossed your mind because you have no idea what you should do next after graduation, besides you haven't got any job." Like, OMG. I had that desire not because I did not know what to do. I was exactly want to get my post-graduate degree because I did want it and I was still curious to know more about the field I had studied. On the other hand, I was not really into this "money-making" venture.
Okay, back to the topic, synchronicities and detachment.
I slowly set aside my wish to get into college again. There it went. When I started to release that thing, I got the call. It soon drove me to the company I previously worked at.
By the time it came, there was this feeling that said "it is synchronicities." But, did it really happen because I surrendered my wish upon the universe (in short, doing some self-detachment) or was it because "it's the time"? I have not gotten the answer yet.
Yes, this kind of thing then drew me to another thing that (I think) still links to things like this. It is about manifestation and precognition.
I do not know when exactly this happens. Though I have ever experienced the same thing many years ago, I noticed it has happened again more often recently.
It started in the earlier of 2021. I was finished a job interview. Soon after it, there was something said in my heart that told me I would be going to meet them again for a long-period of time. At the same time, I was hoping that I would get that offering. Then. . . Bang! They contacted me that I got the role. On one side, I was totally happy. Then again, my brain choked for a minute when I remembered about the gut feeling that said "they will pick me." My reaction at that moment was maybe like this:
source: memesmonkey.com
Anyway, believe it or not? This post (the paragraph above) had been left for about two years. I drafted it on April or May 2022, I forgot. Funny how I finally decide to publish the story above. Of course many things happened and I feel like I want to add more to this post. As usual, my current activities.
I just remember something (I forgot either I read a quote or watching a movie), there is a famous belief that goes like this: people will take important decisions at the age of 27th. I was not sure at first, but then I reviewed again my journey and I want to say, yes I think that belief is true. I mean, it happened to me.
I did it unintentionally for sure. Though the journey did not look beautiful, but I felt that it directed me to something good. I learned new things, I met new people, and of course my brain keeps expanding for getting more and more knowledge I did not know before. Some people might call it "get out of your comfort zone" 😜.
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By the way, YouTube recapped my all-year-round music. Okay, because this post is a combination of a draft from 2022 and current days, I will post my YouTube Recap from that range of time. Looks funny how it changed not gradually but drastically 😁. I even take it as a representation of my state of mind.
The theme of my 2021 was "still" Owl City. I think I was really sane enough to keep up with some things. I mean, Owl City's songs will always be my playlist when I am in a good mood (cheerful side).
(from end of 2021 to end of 2022)
(thanks YouTube for having it tracked😉)
You can see other songs I guess. One song that kept appearing is Bintang-Bintang by Sherina. Yes, it still has a correlation with Good Riddance. The outro of Bintang-Bintang does bring me back to those time I yearn for as well. I do not know why it feels like that. I should blur some songs because I think it is personal and I want to keep it private.
So, we are in the middle of the year already, I wish this year (2024) will be more cheerful than last year. I think I still need time to heal from something I do not tell anyone. Maybe I still need to process things that just happened or even happened long long ago. But, one thing that I know is, there will be answers for all the questions that are still going unanswered right now. Just like my favorite band (A Great Big World) said, "Some dots they won't connect until the years go by".
If you are facing some obstacle right now, I hope you will pass it soon. If you feel weary, just hold on a little longer. If you are reaching for something, I hope you will get it at the right time. Sometimes the journey does not look like the destination, but there are some good sceneries along the way. In fancy ways, I can sum it with "even instant noodle needs to be cooked!!!" Thank you everyone for making a visit and spending time to read this! 🙆✨
"Whatever happened, happened for the good,
whatever is happening, is happening for the good,
whatever will happen, will also happen for the good"
- Krishna
