Stuck?

Am I wrong if I can't throw my memories away? I mean, stuck in it for almost five years. You can't forget every little things that you've been through. I did this because it makes me feel better rather than I remember that high school moment in head, my junior high school moments are better than the latest ones. Why? When you took a fun together with your friends, I almost did it everyday, spent my times doing dvd marathon with my friends, laughing, screaming and singing along loudly in the house, playing crazy things around the complex and then suddenly met my ‘weird’ teacher. When there's extreme traffic when you went  home, there's an empty way on the other side, I just laid down on that way with my friends and make crazy poses while all the drivers stared at us with “are you crazy” face. And while we're waiting for bus on bus shelter, we started to screaming whenever cars, motorcycle or whoever crossed the freeway. Stayed up late until 3am just wanted to watch my tv series: Prison Break. Oh God, I never get that on my senior high school moments. I mean, I never got positve energy whenever I remember that high school moments than the junior ones.

Playing ‘Owl City’ song in the morning after you went from the market. Opening this blog, writting unimportant things to this blog of mine, opening facebook, twitter, and everything related to media social.

Writting a letter to my crush, and almost doing it whenever I found new ones. But at the end no one I wanna be with, I mean “hey, I like you, but I don't wanna have a relationship with you” because I thought, I was under 18. Does it make sense? I think yes.

Still Westlife song is the biggest thing that filled my jhs moments, and also Camp Rock/ disney song. But the only thing that reminds me with that is “Something Right” by Westlife. I played it when I was in 8th grade. The first time I was being obsessed with NY. And that song really makes me like I have an alarm. When you feel down or lazy to do something and I play this song it's like “Hey, NY is one step ahead!” You never know how much I wanna be there, the city that never sleep, city light, everybody seems so famous. 

I don't know how long I should wait for it, but I believe in myself that someday I can make it true. When my aunty told me how wonderful it was to be there, OMG I felt like she tried to make me envy hahahaha. She said that was amazing to be there, living your life in a small flat, and when you look at your down, you see that Central Park bridge, Yellow cab. How it felt when you for the first time stepped on the JFK airport, you'd feel like you're a superstar, looking at your around, they were all strangers!!! Oh God, I think she didn't realize when she was telling me about that my heart was beating, and playing my imagination with that. 'Cause I wrote some imagination story how it will be to be there and that's definitely close enough to her story, though I wrote that post almost four years ago, and she just told me maybe three months ago. Oh God, is it a sign? Hahaha. And she gave me some tips if someday you have a plan to live your life there. Yeah, you never know how much I'm so obsessed with this city. If you may ask me “what are you gonna do if you're there?” Just a simple answer “I want to take an experience in that city, maybe find a work or find a schoolarship to study at the one of the famous school around there. Like, Martha Graham DC or Juilliard School.

Okay, I think that's enough for me telling you about, again NY. The shockest thing ever is my cousin is in there right now! And I can't deny how much I hate that. Because if she can do it why I can't?

Let's make it real. There's a will, there's a way. See you soon on my next post. Thank you for reading or just visiting to this blog of mine. May the luck be ever in you! And me too! Amen. 💙🗽💙🗽💙🗽💙🗽

There's a different between you stuck in the moment and when you look at your past to make a better you today.

Shane Filan - Once Chords

This is my first tab. I did and found this just by hearing and helped by the keyboard and guitar. So, I'm sorry if there is a mistake. Thanks for your consideration :)

Verse 1

G                                     D

We worry about work, worry about money

                     Em                C
worry if the punch line’s funny

G                         D                    C
We worry if the sky is gonna fall

G                                         D
We worry about winning, worry about losing

Em                                            C
Worry about the roads we’re choosing

G                           D                             C
We worry if that someone’s gonna call

        C             Em
We spend so much precious time tryna 

D

Figure out

                  C                           Em

What this crazy maze of a beautiful world 

D

Is all about

[Chorus]

                   C                      G

So kick on back, fill your cup

             Em                                          D
Put on your favourite song, turn it up

            C                      G                    D
Find a little peace of mind in the sunshine

                                C                               G
Don’t waste your days looking at the clock

          Em                                      D
Say i love you to the ones you got

                        C                 G
Don’t leave a lifetime of rights

                   D
on the wrong side

                                G        D     C
‘Cos you only live once, once, once

                       G        D        G
you only live once, once, once

Verse 2

                             G                                      D

We worry about truths, we worry about lying

                                       Em              C
We worry about how much we’re trying and

                G                 D                  C
When it’s all gonna come to an end

We spend so much precious time tryna figure out
What this crazy maze of a beautiful world is all about

[Chorus]

So kick on back, fill your cup
Put on your favourite song, turn it up
Find a little peace of mind in the sunshine
Don't waste your days looking at the clock
Say i love you to the ones you got
Don’t leave a lifetime of rights
on the wrong side

                                G        D        Em    C

‘Cos you only live once, once, once

                       G        D       C         D
you only live once, once, once

D

Oh oh

C       G         D
once, once, once

So kick on back, fill your cup
Put on your favourite song, turn it up
Find a little peace of mind in the sunshine yeah
Don’t waste your days looking at the clock
Say i love you to the ones you got
Don’t leave a lifetime of rights
on the wrong side yeah
‘Cos you only live once, once, once
you only live once, once, once

Yeah you only live once, once, once
You only live once, once, once

Shane Filan - Beautiful In White Lyrics

C                               G
I'm not sure if you know this
Am                   Em
But when we first met
F            C
I got so nervous
F                G
I couldn't speak

C                  G
In that very moment
Am               Em
I found the one and
F                     C
My love had found its
F              C
Missing piece

[Chorus]

           C                      G
So as long as I live I love you
Am                   Em
Will have and hold you
F                   C                  F       G
You look so beautiful in white
                 C                          G
And from now 'til my very last breath
Am               Em
This day I'll cherish
F                   C                  F         G
You look so beautiful in white

Tonight

C                           G
What we have is timeless
Am             Em
My love is endless
F                     C        F                G
And with this ring I say to the world
C                          G
You're my every reason
Am                     Em
You're all that I believe in
F                  C          F                   G
With all my heart I mean every word

[Chorus]

[Bridge]
(One octave higher, played in D)

And if a daughter's what our future hold
I hope she has your eyes
Finds love like you and I did
But if she's fall in love we'll let her go
I'll walk in down the aisle
She'll look so beautiful in white

[Chorus]
(One octave higher, played in E)

Shane chose "Canon by Pachelbel" to be used as the basic song. So, if you know that song, just follow the same chords. But, so many version of "Canon" that can make you being confused if you haven't heard the other yet. Thanks for coming. Feel free to leave a comment :)

Team Filan. Filaners. Westlifers.

Flashback.

I wanna flashback all my memories. Actually, I wanna share the beautiful memories with him in this year. But the truth there's nothing special with him in this year. Because this year is their happiness, joy, and where their beautiful romance start. The cupid wasn't in me. OK. Let me share.

Ini bermula ketika marching band sekolah kembali "hidup". Gue yang emang dari SD selalu memilih ekskul ini ikutan bergabung. Walaupun waktu itu gue dan temen gue doang yang senior. Tapi tetep gue ikut ekskul ini. Karena siapa tau gue bisa mengikuti lomba marching band yang "dulu" selalu diikuti oleh SD gue di "Tennis Indoor, Gelora Bung Karno". Dan kalian tau sendiri bahwa tennis indoor adalah tempat "Konser Westlife" diadakan. Mungkin gue bisa memainkan imajinasi gue untuk membayangkan gue ikut bernyanyi sama Westlife khususnya Shane Filan di atas panggung. But that was just hope. Because they are disbanded now. That's the baddest news for all the Westlifers in the whole world. By the way, Tahun ini menjadi tahun keberuntungan buat gue, karena gue bertemu Shane Filan pada 3 Oktober 2013 secara gratis diacara Sarah Sechan! Thanks God for the chance! Dan satu lagi, tahun ini adalah tahun dimana John Vesely atau yang biasa dikenal Secondhand Serenade memfollow balik akun twitter gue dan membalas mention gue! Itu merupakan kebahagiaan kecil berlapis keberuntungan yang maha dahsyat!

Back to topic.

Ketika itu gue memegang alat musik "belira". Kalau harfiahnya itu kolintang dalam bentuk lempeng besi, bukan kolintang yang di bentuk dari sebilah bambu. *Ke-sotoy-an gue tentang musik kambuh*. Gue yang disitu merupakan senior, disuruh  untuk mendata adek kelas gue. Dan harus selalu memanggil mereka kalau latihan mau dimulai. Mulailah gue berkenalan dengan adek kelas yang pada memegang alat yang sama. Pada saat itu gue nanya sama satu anak sebut saja namanya "Andria" gue pun menanyakan kelas berapa dan berlanjut ke sebelahnya. Yang akhirnya gue kenal dengan temannya, sebut saja "Firda". Setelah sesi perkenalan itu gue mulai ngobrol-ngobrol banyak dengan adek kelas itu. Yang berakhir dengan Andria meledek Firda dengan menyebut nama seorang cowok, yang membuat "spider sense" gue bekerja cepat menangkap obrolan mereka. Gue langsung noleh ke mereka dan spontan bertanya "SIAPA? Tadi kamu bilang Siapa?" Langsunglah kedua adek kelas ini mengelak satu sama lain. Dan gue memohon banget agar mereka mengulang nama yang baru aja mereka sebut, biar gue memastikan yang mereka sebut itu bener adanya yaitu namanya "David". Dan benar aja. Tiba-tiba mereka langsung bertanya "Ka emang kenapa? Cerita dong." Gue yang pada saat itu engga tau kalo Firda itu juga "love" and "had been try to get" him bercerita panjang lebar apa aja yang selama ini gue harapin, tentang moment- moment sama dia dan apa yang gue rasain semua gue tumpah ruahkan ke kedua adek kelas ini. Dan setelah itu pun setiap sesi latihan maupun ketika berpapasan di koridor Firda selalu memberikan support dan dukungan kepada gue yang saat itu emang "had(ve) been try(ing) to get him dengan kata-kata "Ka semangat ka." Tapi emang setelah sesi gue menumpah ruahkan segala sesuatu tadi gue udah ada feeling "she loves him too". Tapi karena melihat Firda selalu memberi gue semangat, perasaan itu gue buang jauh-jauh.

Sampai suatu ketika. . .

Sebut saja nama adek kelas satu ini "Mutia". Yang pada malam hari sms ke Hp gue yang berisikan "Ka Syari, Ka David jadian ._." Gue berasa disamber petir. *Walaupun gue engga tau rasanya*. Mulailah dari situ kerenggangan antara gue dengan Firda terjadi. Gue engga marah. Gue sangat bahagia ketika David got what he wanted. It's nice when I see him happy even though that's not because of me. Because I know, the more I love him, is the more I have to let him go. Ketika latihan marching band berikutnya gue sama sekali engga ada semangat banget. Bahkan ketika istirahat latihan, gue melihat motornya dia melintas didepan gue dan berhenti di lapangan basket buat menghampiri Firda. Di lapangan upacara gue memasang telinga gue dengan volume paling keras, dan ternyata teman-teman Firda sedang memberikan ucapan selamat. Gue hanya memandangi tuts tuts belira itu dengan tatapan kosong. Lama bagi mereka ngobrol di lapangan basket itu sampai akhirnya waktu istirahat latihan selesai dan mulai lagi sesi latihan kedua. Disaat anak-anak marching telah memegang alat masing-masing, gue engga ngeh kalo pelatih marching lagi ngajak ngobrol gue sampai dia membunyikan stik drum-nya dihadapan gue untuk menyadarkan gue dari tatapan kosong itu. Dia pun bertanya "Kamu kenapa?" Gue yang kaget cuma jawab "Eh, maaf ka. Engga apa-apa kok." Lalu dia mengajak gue untuk latihan dengan yang lainnya. Sesaat setelah gue kembali ke dunia nyata gue, gue melihat di sudut barisan dia tampak "bersedih". (Dia bukan bagian belira lagi, melainkan simbal). Entah yang gue liat bener apa engga, tapi gue sangat sangat sangat yakin, there's tears fill her eyes. And I don't know what it meant.

Dan ketika itu pula gue berfikir kalo gue telah bercerita/ curhat kepada orang yang salah. Tapi kenapa dia selalu memberi gue support agar selalu semangat akan usaha gue untuk mendapatkan Ka David. It takes my time just to thinking about this. And until now I can't get that summary.

Let the time answer all of my questions.

Dan, gue menyimpulkan flashback gue di tahun 2013 ini, senang dan sedih yang seimbang. Senang dalam hal hiburan tapi sedih dalam masalah kisah cinta gue yang dulu paling gue harapkan agar mendapatkan happy-ending stories. Semua diluar pikiran gue. Bahkan gue lupa kapan terakhir kali ka David menyebut nama gue. Yang biasanya setiap papasan selalu menyapa nama gue dengan senyumnya yang kece. *Bahkan iklan pasta gigi kalah kece senyumnya*

OK, at the last. I wish this new year will give me more happiness and joy. And let me know that I can say "I love him" and if God gives me permission wish he will say "I love her, too." Amen.

God, please make all his dreams come true, don't make him sad and disappoint. Make him always smile. Amen. You know I love him so much. And please bring me to New York. Amen.

Thank you, I love you. And, Happy New Year. :)

First Post

well, It's 2013 already. And, this is the first post in 2013 ^_^

And 2012 was the best year for me even though at the end I got a bad news. I guess you know it.

I spent new year eve with the fams and just played Uno at home, and a little BBQ party with the neighbor. HAHA!


Ok, and another bad news for me and all the westlifers around the world is Westlife splitted up. But the best news is the Farewell DVD is number one in UK!
Their last concert was only in Croke Park, Dublin, Ireland. They didn't held a world tour.
And this year, Mark Feehily and Shane Filan will realease their solo album on their first solo career. But, I don't know for sure what's the date they will realease it. Just be patient to wait it.

Ok, My westlife favorite song is still "Something Right". Last month I was searching for the Lighthouse video on the Youtube. While I was searching, I saw a video named "The Making of Something Right" yeah, it means behind the scene of Something Right.

And as it my favorite song, I (happily) opened it. And, you know what? the Youtube said:
"Sorry, this media is unavailable in your country"
What is it like? It's like a doomsday, exactly.
What happen with my country? Why they didn't give permission to my country? Was there something wrong?

Don't you know that I really love that song and really want to see the behind the scene? I hope Sony BMG will fix it soon.

Let's move to other topic.

You know it's a new year. With a hello and goodbye. Let's say hello to our new junior students who will study in our school, and we'll say goodbye to our seniors.

Goodbye to our seniors. There will be a goodbye. And I'm not ready to say goodbye to him. I don't know what it's like, but I think I'm gonna cry.

And about my promise to say all the truth to him, I guess I won't do. There's a girl who standing next to him, now. And, it's impossible. I don't wanna broke their relationship just because my promise last year. Let them enjoy their romance. They deserve it.

Will I get a good boy instead of him? I'm not sure, and I don't think to find another one. I still wanna survive this feeling. But, sooner or later I'll get a choose.

One year ago, I've been waiting for him. Doing something good, something useful, studied hard to get science class and rangking top five, joined in new extracurricular. Joined the choir and marching band, and because of him I chose to joined the Organization of school. And, I chosen as one of the candidate. But I didn't win the election. I did this because he might be interest in me. But, God has a plan. He was looking for another girl. I still remember how I met him. When and where. How we shared every moment. How he treated me. How he gave me the unexpected moment, and how he held me in his arms on my birthday.

Forget it.


Ok, about new year. My first dream in 2013 is.. I dreamed about him. He was standing next to me, and smile. And it was in the airport. I don't know what it means. But. I hope it's a good sign. Maybe it's a sign that I will go to USA. HAHA! lol :D. By the way about airport, I'm still wondering about the location of Soekarno-Hatta International Airport. On the map, it's located on Tangerang. But, if you look around the airport when you will leave the airport there's a big banner written "Welcome to Jakarta" ohyeah, what the hell? It made me confused. Which one the right answer? I think you are being confused, too. hehehe.


Happy New Year 2013. May this year will bring us to the best. And, may our dreams come true. I love you and I love him.

shane filan's photo (2)

again, shane's photo... i love him

what do you think?

i hope i get his signature.. OH GOD!!!!